After years of needing a valid reason to start selling my bedazzled (and reasonably priced) Team Lindsay/Team Dina shirts, I can finally say the reason’s arrived. And it’s arrived in the form of a TMZ breaking news alert that Herbie Fully Loaded star Lindsay Lohan and her totally-not-vicariously-living-through-her-mother Dina Lohan allegedly got into a physical fight during the early morning hours. You know, after they finished partying together in New York City on a Tuesday night.
It started last night when the duo went to a nightclub in New York City. Our photog says they left the club at around 4 AM and headed back to Dina’s home in Long Island. Lindsay and Dina started arguing in the car and it escalated when they got home. We’re told it became physical with Lindsay sustaining a cut on her leg. We’re also told there was property damage — including a broken bracelet of Lindsay’s — that occurred during the scuffle. Cops are still on scene.
Yes, while you experienced vivid dreams about Chad Michael Murray hooking up with Jamie Lee Curtis on the set of an Activia commercial, Linds and Dins finally had the blowout fight that we’ve all eagerly anticipated for years.
It’s not that I wanted Linds to get physically hurt, but I always imagined this amazing scene (shot in sepia tone) where Lindsay finally confronts her mother on destroying her life in every which way possible. And Dina, unsure of how to placate her red-headed wallet, just sputters away nervously in an attempt to calm her down.
But Lindsay sees through her mother for the first time and says something incredibly dramatic and poetic like, “fuck you!” or “I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare, I hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme. I hate the way you’re always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it that you’re not around. And the fact that you didn’t call. But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.”
As always, we eagerly await Michael Lohan’s very valuable commentary on this matter.
Also, Ali Lohan, here’s some unsolicited advice: never come home.