Serena’s actually alive, though. She’s just off pouting in Poughkeepsie, pretending to be Sabrina the Vassar alum from Wisconsin. I don’t know what’s more unbelievable: that Serena is from Wisconsin, or that she went to Vassar. I think it’s safe to say she’s pretending because she’s unable to deal with the rejection she encountered in the final episode of last season. As Serena tells it, though, she’s just starting fresh… with her new boy toy Steven, AKA the oldest son from 7th Heaven.
And it turns out that Serena’s not the only one starting fresh! Nate is set up for another lame love story, this time with a toddler. The Nate plus cougar story line was never really that exciting, but maybe Nate plus child story line will be? And then there’s Rufus, who’s also starting fresh, with a young’n. Not just any young’n, either. Dan walks in on Fake Lola AKA Ivy fucking his father as the episode closes. Weird. Gross. Yuck. Ew. Whereisthisgoing? (At least there are still hijinks.)
While the gang may not be over the the scheming and plotting, there are some things to which we bid adieu: We can say goodbye to likable Lily. She’s officially back with Bart, and since he does nothing but bring out the worst in her, she’s probably going to suck this season. Lily sucking isn’t very surprising, though. Case in point: “How could I have thought it was okay to go all summer without talking to my own daughter?” a stupefied Lily asks when she finally realizes that Serena’s been missing for like, 4 whole months. I’m guessing her being a horrible mother might have something to do with it.
The schizophrenic ups and downs between Blair and Chuck also seem to be over. Watching the pair of them vacillate between love and hate like a rapid cycling bipolar over the last few seasons has been extremely draining for a Chair fan like myself. Maybe I’m biased (they are my two favorite characters), but I think Chuck and Blair are so obviously right for each other that you’d have to be deaf, blind, and have Asberger’s not to pick up on it. That being said, it has been really hard to watching the two of them (a la the script) repeatedly not pick up on it in seasons past.
Last night’s episode, though, finally depicted Chuck and Blair as two independent, strong, capable individuals who just happen to be in love. Good job, writers, for actually propelling characterizations that you’ve created! Please maintain.
Speaking of writers, another feature of the show I hope we are saying goodbye to for the final season is sub par writing in general. The way Blair and Chuck were written made me happy, but my faith in the GG wordsmiths will really be restored if they keep popping out scripts like last night’s. The jokes were zingers, the one-liners were on point, and the banter witty. It was reminiscent of Gossip Girl‘s glory days. There was a spectacular moment when Leighton Meester as Blair Waldorf plugged a Leighton Meester movie (“Serena is not Country Strong…”). So meta. So brilliant. I have high hopes. And with only 9 episodes to go, it’s not that crazy to expect them to deliver.
XOXO, for now.
(Photos: Giovanni Rufino/The CW)