Luckily for us, Suddenly-Prude-Kate grows increasingly upset during this conversation because the Amish aren’t all bad and they end the scene with animal sex questions just lingering in the air. (Oh, but also, do keep in mind that while Suddenly-Prude-Kate doesn’t want to insult the Amish on TV, she’s totally down for leaving the community for Florida and getting a DUI during her younger years. But that’s all in the past now…at least until next episode.)
But all this sex talk got Jeremiah real excited for sex. In fact it got him so excited for sex that he takes Always-Prude-Abe to a gentleman’s club. However now that Abe and Rebecca are going steady, he cannot watch women strip, it’s disrespectful and he will not risk his relationship with Rebecca for this tawdry mess. Obviously this angers Jeremiah because HELLOOOO STRIPPERS! He leaves the strip club in a huff and the two have a heated intellectual debate in the lobby over the merits of strip clubs.
Jeremiah angrily explains the “Bros before Hos” code to Abe. He’s just so annoyed he even has to explain this to Abe at all because it’s so obvious. But it all goes over Abe’s head. Mostly because he’s probably thinking about bros versus gardening hoes. And aren’t those actually two things that go together? How can you hoe without a bro?
Jeremiah leaves Abe outside to figure out this riddle while he goes back into the strip club to get his full performance. On one hand it’s great because there are soooo many strippers, on the other hand the only thing he left with was a boner. (his words I assure you, not mine). Well he also leaves with pussy-footed Abe, who presumably spent his time outside the strip club writing Rebecca poetry about their awesome horse and carriage ride together.
A RIDE THAT SHOULD NOT BE AWESOME BECAUSE TWO PEOPLE WHO JUST LEFT THE AMISH COMMUNITY WOULDN’T BE CHARMED BY A HORSE PULLING A CARRIAGE. END RANT.
Anyways Jeremiah’s now so chock-full of testosterone that he needs to do something manly. And that something isn’t his laundry and it isn’t watching Actually-Not-Prude-Kate make out with strangers when she’s trashed, it’s driving on the open roads. Nothing says “I own a penis” quite like taking a road test.
So far Jeremiah’s driving lessons all consist of him asking for permission to look at hot biddies as they walk by his car. Therefore he’s not at all out of line telling his female driving instructor that he doesn’t get along with bitches. And I’m pretty sure he doesn’t mean bitchy women, but rather he’s just referring to all females as bitches. Why this would upset his female instructor, he doesn’t know. He’s just being honest and being himself. Jeez, women! She’s probably on her period or some shit.
His honesty’s charming and indecent and it makes me hope he’s actually a taxi driver now so I can one day get in his cab, ask him to drive me someplace really far and really inconvenient — and then jump out without paying.