This fan of the Kardashian clan has either seen too many bad spy movies, or somehow thinks that Scott Disick is 007. Which could be an honest mistake, with the reality star’s penchant for expensive suits. At any rate, TMZ got their hands on this bizarre, handwritten letter that someone sent to Scott (via his restaurant Ryu) asking Scott and Kim Kardashian to meet him at a public library in New Jersey this Saturday.
I’m going to assume that the sender is male, because of all the spy fascination and because if a woman wanted Scott that badly, she wouldn’t bother with this subterfuge and would just try and pick him up at a bar. The stranger claims that he’s done many “gigs” with Kim and Kanye West in the past, and that he wants to offer Scott a “gig” too.
You can read the whole letter here if you can decipher the handwriting, but the long and short of it is this: The sender gives them detailed instructions to meet at the Little Ferry Public Library in Jersey. He writes that he’ll be there on September 29th from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m., and here’s how Scott should approach him:
There is a table next to computers 7 and 8 or you can sit by the corner. You can wear sunglasses or you can walk up to me with your glasses on and hand this note. Then I will know and we’ll leave the library.
What I find weird is that this guy didn’t even take the time to Google what Scott looks like and is relying on the reality star to approach him. Now that TMZ has published the letter, anyone could show up at the library and troll this guy who’s obviously not right in the head. Then he writes a special aside for Kim:
Kim you know what I look like. I will be wearing a green and black shirt. You can wear all white. No makeup ok.
Good luck with that, buddy! Again, this is clearly amateur hour—if you want the Kardashians to come to you, you sure as hell don’t tell them to go to Jersey. Maybe Brooklyn, and that’s pushing it.