A Mysterious Real Housewives Of New Jersey Producer Reveals Juicy Filming Secrets

Ripped from the pages of a RL Stine novel comes the shocking, possibly true story of how the Real Housewives of New Jersey producers plan out every single season before it begins filming. Yeah, that’s right. There are story arcs before there are even stories. Oh, and it gets even juicer. Juicer than Joe Giudice after he cheats on his wife.

Want to know the real reason Teresa Giudice and Jacqueline Laurita aren’t friends anymore? It has nothing to do with what you’ve seen on TV this year.

So sit back and relax as we read allegations from a random blog that claims to have insider access to the most scandalous show ever filmed about New Jersey housewives. (Sorry Danielle Jonas, you don’t even come close to these levels of instability.)

FAME-WHORGAS, a blog filled with so much Teresa Giudice love and so much Melissa Gorga hate that I’m starting to believe Gia Giudice launched it, received a transcript of an interview with a former RHONJ production supervisor.

Q: “I’m curious about the Caroline/Teresa feud. Was she really that angry that Teresa wrote those comments in her cookbook?”

A: (laughing) “Oh come on, at the start of the season the production team sits down and gives a general overview of where we want the storyline for the show to go. ALL of the wives are in on this. We discuss popular storylines from the season before, story lines that need tying up, and also ways of threading in new storylines that look organic to the story. Do you really think we spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on just following these woman around with no plan? No, the season and the storyline has a basic outline from the first day.”

Yeah, come on! Of course it’s all scripted. No one could possibly be this crazy right!? Wrong.

Q: “So your saying there is no feud?”

A: “I’m saying the feud you are being fed is for television only and there are bigger issues there.”

LOLsies. They actually are this crazy. Perhaps even crazier if there’s bigger issues that they’re not talking about on TV. That scares me. Mostly because I’m just a state away and who knows what these bigger issues can be. I suppose if I had to guess, I’d assume they’re somehow about Ashley/Ashlee Holmes. Only because she’s the worst!

Could they be about this?

Q: “What about Jacqueline and Teresa?”

A: “We knew at the end of season 3 that their friendship was ending; the main reason, I was told, for the feud was because Jacqueline was offered several endorsement deals (including a teeth whitener and a real fruit-based alchohol), and Teresa organised deals for herself with similar products which turned off the company wanting to invest in Jax and the housewives’ name.”

Q: “Well, why was this not mentioned throughout the season? Why are we getting this confusing story that makes Jacqueline look crazy? Why not explain this to the viewers?”

A: “Jacqueline’s ‘character’ wouldn’t have endorsement deals; it didn’t feel right for the character.Jacqueline (the character) is a loving home mother who is trying to raise her children; we couldn’t go from doting housewife to celebrity endorsement maker; it wouldn’t feel organic.”

Wow! Theresa stole Jacqueline’s chance to endorse toothpaste AND fruit-based alcohol. No wonder they hate each other. Everyone knows competing endorsement deals always ruin friendships.

Why, I stopped talking to my best friend in 2nd grade for that very reason! So I’m not shocked about this. Nope, not shocked at all. It’s just too bad Jacqueline had to be put on airs all season and not tell everyone the truth behind their crumbling friendship.

Is any of those true? Who knows. It seems too good to be true. Here we were thinking that everyone on that show just needed electroshock therapy and now we’re finding out that they’re just actors honing in on their craft.

Dammit.

Just tell me anonymous production supervisor, is any of the story we’ve seen this actually true? Is Milania Giudice even a real child. Or is she like the undersized adult from Orphan? I can’t sleep until I know the answer.

 

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