After many years of sad, fruitless attachment to the decrepit-but-horny Hugh Hefner, Holly Madison has finally settled down with a nice, age-appropriate, non-magician fellow named Pasquale Rotella. And, miracle of miracles, now she is preggers with a tiny helping of rotelli pasta.
The 32-year-old Madison first told People she was ready to have a baby back in June, saying that she hadn’t renewed her contract with her Las Vegas strip show in anticipation of motherhood. “Definitely being with the right guy has a lot to do with it,” she explains now. “My relationship is awesome. I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my personal life.” I hope Hef isn’t too busy motorboating his sex serfs to notice that burn.
As happy as I am that Holly got out of that creepy, dead end relashe before her eggs got old, I have to hope that baby isn’t a girl. A mother’s body image and ideas on beauty impact her daughter immensely, and this is a woman who has spent countless hours, dollars, and drops of her own blood transforming into Hugh Hefner’s ideal woman. On the one hand, she’s incredibly self-aware about how her time in the Playboy mansion affected her self-esteem, and her honesty on how plastic surgery helped her career is refreshing. On the other, she doesn’t seem that bothered by the ridiculous standard women are expected to contort themselves into. “My nose photographed really big in front of my face,” she once said. “If I wanted to do anything in the entertainment industry, I needed to get it fixed…A lot of doors open when you look a certain way.” Of course, there’s a chance she’ll try not to impose this shit on her daughter (provided she doesn’t want to be in the entertainment business?), but simply having a mom who’s had a ton of surgery to look like Barbie might be enough to mess a kid up.
Plus, I just Googled her baby daddy and found out he’s being indicted on 29 counts of RAVE FRAUD. Oh well. At least he’ll probably still be alive when his kid graduates from high school.