• Tue, Aug 21 2012

Taylor Swift & Conor Kennedy Are Moving Very Fast, Might Get To Third Base Soon

It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No, it’s the Taylor Swift and Conor Kennedy relationship! The world’s most exciting new phenomenon continues to impress us with how quickly they’re passing relationship milestones.

One day they’re holding hands at the Kennedy compound, the next they’re buying houses next to said compound and then the next they’re visiting graveyards together. Yes, NY Daily News spotted the pair visiting Conor Kennedy’s mother’s grave.

Wearing Ray-Ban sunglasses, slipon leather loafers and a pleated, short-sleeved dress bursting with a pattern of spring flowers, Swift held Conor’s hand and caressed him as they honored his mom.

At one point, the singer and the grieving group appeared to bow their heads in prayer.

While I can’t speak from experience, I think it’s probably fair to say that visiting your mother’s grave with your girlfriend takes things up a notch on the serious relationship ladder. Sure it’s great that Conor Kennedy feels like he met someone who he can share his life with — good and bad — but since the kid’s only 18-years-old, I fear that he’ll probably end up getting hurt.

Especially when he’s at a frat party in a few years and he hears Taylor Swift singing a song about him on the radio called, “I am never ever dating someone born in the ’90s again. Is anyone interested in real estate in Hyannis?”

So maybe an adult needs to sit down with these two lovebirds and explain to them that since they’re 18 and 22 (and living drastically different lives) there’s a slight-to-large chance this won’t work out. Perhaps they can stop playing grown-up relationship games and instead be content just annoying everyone on their Facebook newsfeed with lovey-dovey talk.

Otherwise, if they keep pretending like this relationship is some kind of avant-garde audition for The Fast and Furious 8, we’re going to be hearing wedding bells. Or worse, hearing the pitter-patter of Baby Swift-Kennedy’s feet.

Then again, knowing Taylor the way I do, I’m sure Conor’s just rounding second base as we speak.

Now if only he can find the key to that padlock on her bra.

(Photo: Taylor Swift Web)

 

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