The Lady Gaga Vogue cover I know you’ve all been waiting for is here, and it features a beauty statement so boldly awful that it pretty much overshadows anything else I might have liked about it. If this is what Vogue means by “hair is the new makeup,” I’m not sure that’s a trend I want any part in.
As you can see, Gaga’s hair looks like she stuck her finger in an electrical socket, with a puffy, teased globe extending from all sides of her head. She claimed in a tweet to be “coming for” drag queen extraordinaire RuPaul:
And on LittleMonsters to be channeling “fozzibear” [sic.].
First of all, just because you have a bad weave doesn’t mean you can even think about stepping to RuPaul. A cursory GIS reveals RuPaul’s weave to be flawless in all situations. Rupaul would never allow her hair to look like this.
And as for Fozzie Bear, I’m not sure I see the resemblance, other than the fact that they both like to pose with their mouths open:
I guess they both have curly hair, but Gaga’s hair here has really vaulted right over curly and gone straight to “otherworldly puffball” consistency.
I will say that the Marc Jacobs dress is gorgeous, and sticks with the mermaid theme Gaga continues to harp on. But I guess long, flowing mermaid locks would have been too conventionally pretty and predictable. Maybe Gaga’s not entering phase 2 of her plan yet, after all.