Whether or not season 8 is the final season of How I Met Your Mother, we’ve definitely hit the home stretch. And we’re in a weird place, storytelling-wise, because we know that Barney and Robin eventually get married, which is also where Ted finally meets The Mother. Yet, all of the spoilers for this season have revolved around who these three are dating, when none of them are their soulmates.
You’d think that it would make season 8 (and the rumored season 9) a snorefest, except that HIMYM‘s raison d’etre is to elevate the journey over the destination. So I’m cautiously trusting creators Carter Bays and Craig Thomas to make us care about why Robin needs to fulfill her fantasy of going out with Battlestar Galactica‘s Michael Trucco, or how Quinn will make her fiance Barney a better man before he ultimately leaves her for Robin.
Especially when Thomas describes it in horror movie terms. He and executive producer Pamela Fryman spoke to TVLine and offered up a whopping 16 spoilers—though I’ll warn you, they’re really not that scandalous. Well, there’s talk of The Wedding:
Thomas: We jump further forward in that future wedding day. … The glimpses of that future Barney/Robin wedding day have been really important to the story. We blow [everything] out of the water in Episode 1. We jump further into that day and show you more information deeper into that wedding day that I think will blow some people’s minds. It’s really, really exciting.
Fryman: It blew mine when I read it.
Thomas: It’s the day Ted meets the mother. And we jump perilously deep into that day and show you some glimpses of some really huge stuff that’s happening. We jump to the end of that wedding day and show you something crazy.
OK, I’m legitimately excited to see what they’ll do with the wedding. I’ve always been in awe of Bays and Thomas’ talent for mapping out their characters’ stories and natural twists years in advance. But first we gotta get there. And last we saw, the only bride in 2012 was Victoria, who at the least used Ted as the getaway car to flee her wedding and at the most may have agreed to elope with him! So here’s what Thomas would say about breaking up these three couples of Ted/Victoria, Barney/Quinn, and Robin/Secret Crush:
We’re in a funny predicament. [The premiere] begins with three couples we know are doomed: Barney and Quinn – Barney’s going to marry Robin – Victoria we’ve said is not the mother, and Robin has a new love interest that starts off the season too, played by Michael Trucco. But we know Robin’s going to end up marrying Barney. It’s cool to start with everybody coupled up, but it’s like a horror movie. We know all these people camping at Camp Crystal Lake are going to be killed by Jason in a hockey mask. There’s a fun feeling of doom to these three couples. We’re calling October, “Breakup Month.” This is the month where some stuff went crazy in these relationships.
Hmm, I haven’t heard romance discussed in such gory terminology since I watched Cabin in the Woods. But it’s an incredibly apt comparison to use, since with this kind of show we are armed with the dramatic irony. I wouldn’t be surprised if, while watching season 8, my friends and I end up yelling things like “Don’t pick up the phone!” or “Stay in your apartment!” to these doomed couples.
One more tidbit of good news! Thomas kinda, sorta, maybe promised one final Robin Sparkles number. At least, he said this:
[Co-creator] Carter [Bays] and I haven’t quite figured this out yet. We’re going to release the How I Met Your Mother soundtrack album! All the original music [on the show] will come out the day of our season premiere [on Sept. 24 on iTunes]. It’s like 20 tracks. It’s really cool. So it got me thinking again about Robin Sparkles.
You get the impression that there was more to that quote that TVLine didn’t publish, but you have to imagine that Bays and Thomas would feel obligated to give their fans one more Canadian pop ditty before HIMYM bows.