How Tom Cruise Keeps Suri From Being Photographed, And Other Behind-The-Scenes Stories From A Paparazzo

Now that paparazzi themselves are ending up on the other side of the camera lens, it’s certainly tempting for someone to capture the moment when a star snaps and starts whaling on a photographer. While Dan acknowledged the chance for profit, he said it’s not for him:

Hell yeah, that’s real money right there. Not just from the pic, but from the lawsuit. But that’s just too low for me. Some dude is suing Justin Bieber saying that the Biebs hurt him. But I’d rather be poor than tell people that I got beat up by Bieber.

He hinted at which photo of his the public will never see, and of course now we’re insanely curious:

Conan O’Brien being hysterically funny outside while waiting for his car. My old company has it and won’t use it because he’s funnier than them.

Most interestingly, there are often stars who neither hide from nor hit the paparazzi, and instead want to know all about the people who photograph them:

Yeah, lot’s of times they take pictures of us and I always joke they should “respect my privacy”. But some celebs are really inquisitive about it. Jason Schwartzman was super curious and one time this guy asked me like a hundred questions and was so excited. Then when he walked away I realized he wrote Shrek and all of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies because he started hugging Jerry Bruckheimer.

Just so you don’t think that all celebrities he runs into are assholes, here’s the nicest one he’s encountered:

My favorite favorite favorite Yvette Nicole Brown. She plays Shirley on the TV show Community. You will not walk away from her without a smile on your face. She’s angelic.

And because I turned Dan’s AMA into a post, I’ll plug his YouTube show Dangle TV. The show still focuses on the paparazzi and celebrity culture, but with more of a comedic bent—and Dan makes sure he gets permission from every person he films.

Photo: ???

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    • Shelly

      As we are subjected to daily–if not twice daily–photos of Suri Cruise, I find this account not to ring true at all. She is far and away the most photographed celebrity child on the face of the earth–if not the most photographed human being alive, period.

      Also–wasn’t it TMZ that had the great video of Tom and Katie walking out of a restaurant to a swarm of paparazzi, and when Tom joked with them as to how they all knew the two of them were there, the response was basically: “uh, because you CALLED us, Tom, that’s why”.

      I also clearly remember the first-hand accounts of their fleet of SUVs pulling over to a random grassy area at the side of the road, Tom, Katie and Suri emerging to be photographed there by a professional hired team, and later the shots showing up at entertainment outlets as “their day at the park”.