Statistics say that one in every thirty Crushable readers has Tom Cruise’s cell phone number. So if you’re one of the people with direct access to him, please read this important Tom Cruise parenting article and then call him to discuss it. He’s always open to conversations on child rearing as well as conversations on discrete high-heeled shoes for men. I read that on the front page of The Wall Street Journal last week. I think. Or in a diary entry I wrote to Katie Holmes. Who can keep track anymore?
So with no further ado, let’s discuss Tom Cruise and his healthy marriage to Katie Holmes. Just kidding. It’s not May 2012 so that sentence no longer makes any sense. No, let’s talk about how he views his daughter Suri Cruise and how one quote feeds into all the rumors we’ve heard about him being a controlling husband and father.
One pronoun. So many interpretations.
Early this morning Radar Online reported that Tom Cruise is speaking with Suri all the time via video chat. (While they didn’t confirm whether a late night session on chat roulette inspired him to use the same communication device for communicating with his daughter, it goes without saying.) His attorney Bert Fields said the following about the situation:
“Tom will be seeing Suri very soon. I don’t know exactly when that will be, and I couldn’t tell you, but I do know it will be very soon. Tom loves his Suri very, very much, as he does his other two children. Tom is a family man and dedicated to his children. They are the center of his world,” Fields said last week.
Did you catch that? Tom Cruise loves his Suri. Opposed to Tom Cruise loves Suri. Or Tom Cruise loves his daughter Suri. There’s just something so possessive about referring to Suri as “his Suri.” Almost like he views her like an expensive toy. Tom Cruise loves his private airplane. Tom Cruise loves his ceramic cat collection. Tom Cruise loves his Suri.
See what I’m saying? It’s like all those rumors about him viewing Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise as expensive props in a neverending play titled, “who can I marry and impregnate next?”
And while some people may say I’m reading too much into this quote from his lawyer, I don’t think you can read enough into anything that comes out of this divorce. Then again I’m so into the Tom-Cruise-Katie-Holmes-Scientology conspiracy that I’ll overanalyze anything that comes my way. For you. I do it all for you!