Adele is due to give birth in two months. Even though we just found out about this pregnancy two weeks ago. This is more surprising than the time I found a current magazine sitting in my OB-GYN’s waiting room. It’s like she looked at Jessica Simpson’s pregnancy and said to baby daddy Simon Konecki, “actually I want to do the exact opposite of that.”
So far she hasn’t “shown off” her baby belly on one magazine cover. It’s almost like she doesn’t want to profit off her future child. And that’s super refreshing in a world where we’re used to watching a celebrity child go from embryo to fetus to infant to aspiring actress who wants to get into the business despite the fact her parents are all like, “I would never want my daughter to be an actress, but if she’s going to do it anyways, let me pull ALL the strings.”
Which means that this baby’s coming into the world with the chance of having a normal life. Maybe, just maybe, even a normal name. Assuming, of course, that Simon’s not one of those secret scientologists who shows up on a “Top 10 Semi-Celebs You Didn’t Know Prayed To Xenu” lists that come out every year. And that only makes us more excited to see who this baby grows up to be.
But before we start coming up with potential normal names for this child, let me just make a few rearrangments and make sure Edible Arrangements knows that their “Bundle of Fruit Joy” congrats basket will need to go out sooner than I thought.