Poor Joe Giudice. The man’s constantly making headlines for his horrendous driving decisions and today’s no different. Just another day as the most-hated husband on Real Housewives of New Jersey.
According to his wife Teresa Giudice’s Facebook status, he didn’t properly secure the trunk of his car when preparing to drive his children to school and drove onto the freeway completely unsuspecting of the terror that would unfold. Naturally, it opened up (as trunks tend to do when they’re not properly closed) and6-year-old Milania Giudice’s class pet tumbled into the road.
She freaked out. Not only because she’s 6 and she just witnessed a car accident and the possible death of a class pet, but also because she’s a Giudice. Their family motto is to make every bad situation worse by yelling and screaming.
Luckily the hermit crab survived. Unluckily for everyone else, Joe Giudice also did. Just kidding. I don’t wish death on the oaf. I just wish he would be smarter and be safer and be able to properly secure a car before driving his young children to school. Closing a trunk’s not that hard. Even for Juicy Joe.
But neither is driving sober and driving on a legal license, two things Joe Giudice cannot do. Hence his DUI in 2010 and his subsequent arrest for illegally obtaining a license when his was suspended FOR HIS DUI.
While I’d love to assume that Teresa and Joe will use this almost-murderous-mishap to remind people not to drive your kids to school when you’re too
drunk distracted to close the trunk, I’m sure they’ll just find a way to blame this on Caroline Manzo. That’s protocol these days.