• Tue, Jun 5 2012

It’s So Cute That Joe Jonas Thinks He’s Better Than One Direction

Update: Two Jonas Brothers fans respond to this post here and here

Back in the 2000s, the Jonas Brothers ruled the playlists of Limited Too stores across the country. Tween girls everywhere bought bras 6 sizes too large just to send to them with sweet promises of letting Kevin, Joe and Nick be their first kiss. But now the Jo Bros, as they’re known by bloggers trying to sound hip and with it, moved onto bigger and better projects like hosting the Miss USA Pageant, performing on Broadway and getting married in order to lose their virginity.

While the boys left the tween spotlight to go sow their wild oats, One Direction moved in and they moved in hard. One day I didn’t know who they were and they next day I was joining in on the Twitter attacks against Liam Payne’s girlfriend.

Before you could even say, “are they even legal,” I cut my hair to match Harry Styles and I tattooed Niall Horan’s face over my heart. I’m a woman possessed when it comes to this slightly legal British boy band and I pride myself on knowing all their names. Something that not every 25-year-old can do. (Or possibly should do. Or brag about. Or put in writing and publish.)

Before Joe Jonas could even get a hand job from one last fan, his time in the sun ended. No one remembered who he was or what songs he sang or that he was once more famous than the Lawrence brothers. So he decided to do what all desperate celebrities do in their time of need, pretend like they’re better than the people who took their place.

It’s pulling the old “oh, being a famous tween idol is sooo yesterday. It’s so much easier to live in a world where 12-year-olds aren’t throwing themselves at you” schtick.

Yesterday Joe Jonas pulled this very card when Ryan Seacrest interviewed him for On Air With Ryan Seacrest and asked about One Direction’s attempt to keep their relationships secret.

“I think they definitely want people to think they’re single. I mean, I’ve been through it you know, and I get it and I understand that it’s important.” Joe continued, ”I can always tell if they do have a girlfriend or if they don’t. If they’re like, ‘Oh, I’d rather not talk about it…’ Or they’re like, ‘I like to keep my personal life to myself,’ it’s like, ‘Buddy, your personal life is all over everywhere, what are you talking about?’”

While it’s downright charming that Joe Jonas thinks he “gets” One Direction, I think we all know he doesn’t. When was the last time someone made a 500-GIF tumblr post for him. Or even started a Twitter trend dedicated to take down his girlfriend.

Never?

The Jonas Brothers definitely had their moment of fame, but I think we all know it’s nothing compared to what One Direction’s experiencing right now. They’ve entered the Bieber-sphere of fan worship and Joe Jonas can’t even begin to understand what they’re going through. So while it’s super cute that he’s trying to name drop them in an attempt to stay relevant around 7th grade lunch tables, it’s also somewhat pointless.  So why doesn’t he just do what the rest of us are doing and just play “What Makes You Beautiful” on repeat all day?

 

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  • Moi

    Not to mention, twitter probably wasn’t as popular and tumblr might not have even been around when the JoBros were big. “500 gif tumblr post”. lololol

  • Jessica

    Seriously? This writer is crazy. The Jonas Brothers are amazing and always will be and so are One Direction.

  • Guest

    The Jonas Brothers have a massive, massive fan base, They are and forever will be better than One Direction. I can’t see One Direction having as big a fan base as this after 6 years, I can’t see One Direction having that many fans left if they took a 3 and a half year break, I can’t see One Direction winning a Grammy or performing with the greats, I can see One Direction selling out MSG as fast as the Jonas Brothers did. We don’t trend topics about hate to the boys girlfriend because we respect and love Joe, Nick and Kevin. Stuff like that would upset our boys so we don’t do that, why would yyou want to? The majority of ”Directioners” are just down right rude, to other fan bases and to One Directions girlfriends and they are known for that. I don’t even have enough time to type out how much better Joe, Nick and Kevin are than the One Direction boys but one thing is for sure, they have a much bigger, truer,kinder and stronger fan base than One Direction will ever have.

  • Dinos

    Fuck you

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