5 Suggestions for Teen Mom‘s Amber Portwood Instead Of Prison

When in doubt, dye your hair and get the hell out of dodge. It doesn't matter where she goes, but dropping completely out of the limelight might be a step in the right direction.

Actually rehab keeps you alive and probably is a bit more comfortable than prison.

Sometimes moving to a foreign place can give you the ultimate perspective on your life; and in doing so, it can help you get your shit together.

Maybe a long vacation somewhere? On a beach where the only drug in sight is a pina colada?

While I think this is a bunch of fucking malarkey, some people, truly lost and weak people, need religion to show them "the way."