Yes, you read that title right. I wasn’t aware of this, but apparently the ground-breaking and informative news source Toddlers and Tiaras has boy-crazies on it as well as girl-crazies. Whatever, I’m into it, it’s 2012. Welcome to the future.
This particular boy-crazy is a six-year old named Traven, and, in his own words, he’s “really something”. In his mother’s words, he “goes from an angel to a demon in 0.2 seconds.” Interesting.
I guess I’m inclined to agree with the mom, as I just watched this kid fire his barber Donald-Trump-style, tell his grandmother she should work at the local strip club, and flail around on the ground trying to get the “creepy devil” that possesses him out of his body.
He also marched his way through the house screaming, “This is my house! I deserve this house!” and instructed us, “I’m a grown-up. Nobody tells me what to do. NOBODY TELLS ME WHAT TO DO.”
How did this…who made this little human? And why? Why are we grooming this child to be the world’s worst person ever in the world? Some of his behavior is bizarre enough to be almost cute because it’s really jarring coming out of the mouth of a six-year old, but that’s gonna wear off pretttttty quickly when this kid is a preteen. If it hasn’t already.
The only thing I have to look forward to is the day when this kid is some wannabe bully at age thirteen and one of his middle school classmates finds this on YouTube. Oh revenge, you shall be so sweet.
Watch the full ridiculous video of Traven at Gawker.com.