• Thu, May 24 2012

Hard News: Charlize Theron Talks About Michael Fassbender’s Busy Penis

Just when I thought I couldn’t love Charlize Theron anymore, she opens up about her Prometheus co-star Michael Fassbender and his penis. It’s just so lovely to hear a female actress talk so affectionately about her co-stars genitals during an interview for Snow White and the Huntsman.

MTV interviewed Charlize about her upcoming alien thriller and naturally asked her how much Fassbender penis we should expect to see in Prometheus. Unfortunately for my Shame fan club, the answer is none. No Fassbender penis for us this time around. Feel free to take a moment to mourn.

I think we all know that Charlize Theron and Fassbender’s penis would be a charming on-screen couple that could possible rival the love connection we saw in When Harry Met Sally. But alas, it’s not happening.

Why did Fassbender’s penis not even make a cameo? Charlize charmingly explains in her MTV interview:

“Oh my god. I don’t think it was available. It was shooting the sequel for ‘Shame’ so we couldn’t get it for ‘Prometheus.’ I had to see it, because it was gone, so it was on dailies from New York. It’s a hitch penis. The penis attaches and works separately, it’s a whole working entity.”

Hitch penis! That’s genius and funny and I just really want to be her BFF. And if the position for her BFF’s already filled, then I’ll be Jackson’s nanny. She just always comes off as so wonderful and great during interviews and I really think we’d get along.

I also think I’d get along wonderfully with Fassbender’s penis. But I heard he’s a real diva. Also Fassbender always accompanies his penis everywhere and  never seems to understand that he’s totally a third wheel. Awkward!

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