So the trailer for The CW’s Sex and the City prequel series The Carrie Diaries is out now, and it looks predictably bad. Also predictably, I’m going to watch it.
Set in suburbia, The Carrie Diaries is the origin story of the love-craving shoe monster with an improbably lucrative sex column who appears in Sex and the City. AnnaSophia Robb plays the young Carrie Bradshaw with the prerequisite amount of wide-eyed-ness, although it’s as yet a mystery how someone with a face this round is supposed to grow up into the famously horse-faced woman. Maybe she has an accident?
As far as I can tell, Carrie is introduced to New York City when some handsome guy in a suit suggests she get an internship there. It’s not long before some fashionista likes her purse and casts her in a fashion shoot(?), and that’s it–she’s totally in love!
She also has a trio of proto-best-friends to talk about sex with, although “putting a hot dog in a keyhole” is not really the most evocative line they could have chosen to describe sex…in my mind, the hot dog would get totally destroyed in this scenario, because keyholes are made of metal, hot dogs of processed meat. I also think that in deference to The Hipster Grifter, we should declare a moratorium on any and all use of “hot dog” by Asian girls to refer to penises, because it’s so been done.
But I digress! Like SATC, this show seems like it will be more about its female characters talking about sex than actual sex itself, because that’s what BFFs do. But if they’re such great friends, why doesn’t Carrie keep in touch with them later in life? How does she land that high-paying sex column? And does she lose her virginity to the hot swimmer guy? These mysteries, plus a promising soundtrack of ’80s pop, will probably compel me to watch at least part of one episode.