• Wed, May 16 2012

6 Burning Questions I Have After Watching The Real Housewives of Orange County

Well guys, it’s time for another installment of everyone’s favorite reality TV series on Bravo - -The Real Housewives of Orange County. This week’s episode about our favorite divas in SoCal brought us much to talk! Last night’s episode was entitled “Happy Never After”, which I find to be super negative Andy Cohen, but I get why you went in that direction. It seemed like nobody was 100% hunky dory in this episode, especially Vicki and Tamra. (Two women who also happen to be the two women dealing with divorces. Coincidence?) Everybody is up to their same ole antics in this episode, and I’m happy to break it down for you. Let’s see what our OC ladies were up to this week!

Alexis threw her twin daughters an outrageously awesome 4th birthday party. Gretchen is still on the fence about marrying Slade while Heather was helping him pick out an engagement ring. Tamra got her “Simon” tattoo removed and made Eddie, her Latin lover, shit his pants. Vicki battled it out with her newlywed daughter, Brianna about the men in their lives. Now that you have an idea of what went on during this episode, let’s get down to my questions for the day, shall we?

1. Does every housewife have a child named Milania? 

I’m sorry, Alexis, but Teresa Guidice has a daughter named Milania too (who is a devil child this season BTW) and I’m not sure if there can be another Milania walking around the Bravo clubhouse. Two housewives having a child with the same name shouldn’t seem like that big of a deal, but it’s not like their name is “Judy” or “Sarah”! It’s MILANIA! That’s not you everyday name, people. You get where I’m going with this. I think I might just have to name my kid Milania too. Why not?

2. How amazing was Alexis’ speech at her daughter’s birthday party?

Alexis gave this big speech before the little girls make their “grand entrance” into their Princess Puppy Party (which is the best theme for a party ever!). She talks to this huge crowd of 50+ people about how she had a pulmonary embolism while she was in labor and how no medications were working and she always died during labor with the twins. She tells everyone how she almost died during labor. At a children’s birthday party. Hilarious. I know she means well, but it’s just hilarious because she is totally unaware of how ridiculous she is. You can tell she really loves her kids though, and that’s what’s important. Alexis just provides me with tons of entertainment, and I love it.

3.  Is the secret to a happy marriage separate toilets?

Gretchen goes over to Heather’s house to hang (and see the gigantic mansion that she lives in) and sees that Heather and Terry have not only his and her sinks, but also his and her toilets. Heather swears that this is the key to a happy marriage. It “keeps the mystery” according her. I mean, I think I get where she’s coming from with this. It took me 6 months to poop at my old boyfriend’s apartment. I used to walk to the Starbucks on the corner everyday to do it. Real talk. Is that TMI, guys? Sorry. But anyways, Gretchen says she is scared to get married again because of the financial situations that she doesn’t want to take it on. Heather tells her that communication is key in relationships and especially when it comes to the issue of marriage, but maybe they just need separate toilets.

4. Should Tamra ever have gotten that tattoo?

I think we all know the answer to this one: Hell to the No. She went to all that trouble to get the tattoo to prove to a man she didn’t even love that he meant the world to her. And now she’s getting her “Simon” tattoo removed by my favorite man in the world! Terry! She’s getting her skin cut off! That is super hardcore. Tamra definitely gets some Badass Points for that one. This is a perfect example of why a person should never ever, ever, ever get someone’s name tattooed on their body unless it’s a family member you really love or a dead person who you can’t divorce or break up with. Do you guys think Simon watches the show? I bet he’s pissed.

5.  Is it normal for Tamra to have her fears?

Tamra goes out to dinner with Eddie, and they start talking about the kids. She mentions how they don’t feel comfortable at Eddie’s house. He says they need to spend more time there so they do feel comfortable. That makes a lot of sense, Latin Lover. She then starts to break down a little bit and admits that they reason she doesn’t bring the kids around a lot is because she’s scared that if he really gets to know the kids and gets a feel for how they are, he’ll leave. I think it’s really endearing to see her kind of break down and be real. She’s was so honest and open with him. She is insecure and scared and she’s a girl so duh, aren’t we all a little cooky when we get in a relationship? She keeps asking Eddie why he loves her and not some other young chick because she needs verbal reassurance (like every girl on the planet, duh.) and he is more than willing to give her a little confidence boost which is nice. I totally get why she feels that way. Tamra, way to be real, girl! I dig it!

6. Is emotional cheating worse than physical cheating?

Vicki and her daughter, Brianna, really got into it at the end of this episode. Both of them feel that the other is moving too fast with their significant other. Brianna is afraid Vicki is just lonely and latching onto Brooks. While Vicki is mad that Brianna rushed into marriage. Brianna is like, “Mom, you’re still legally married. Why are you already in a serious relationship? Cool your jets.” Brianna is convinced that Brooks is shady bizz, and I don’t blame her. She reveals that Brooks has four kids from three different women, DUI arrests, child support issues, etc. Brianna then says that she knows “a lot, a lot more than you think I do!” What does Brianna know?! Did Vicki and Brooks have an affair while she was still with Don?! She then tells her mother that emotionally cheating is worse than physically cheating. I think I have to agree with her. What do you guys think?

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