Dude, Miley Cyrus and Demi Moore must be ROTFL-ing all over Hollywood this week. Their new movie LOL bombed. No, what’s worse than a bomb? A black hole? Yes, let’s go with that. The new Miley Cyrus movie black-holded in a big way.
And I’m not JK-ing here. I’m very much for real. This LOL disaster is so ironically not a laughing matter. Seriously it’s so ironic, I just called Alanis Morissette’s on the phone and she totes confirmed it’s ironic.
The movie premiered on 100 screens during its opening weekend and only grossed $46, 500. That will buy you like no salvia. Maybe an ounce. But definitely no more than that. Odds are Demi Moore probably spent more than $46,500 on botox in one day of shooting this movie. $46,500 is seriously bad.
The math wizards over at Film Drunk did a few calculations:
LOL‘s per-screen average was $440. Divide that by $11, which is about your average ticket price, and it comes out to 40 people per theater who saw LOL this weekend. The closest theater to me showing LOL had five showings per day. Multiply that by three days, fifteen showings, and that’s 40 people into 15 screenings, meaning, if my math serves (and I fully acknowledge that it might not), that the average screening of LOL had LESS THAN THREE VIEWERS (2.667). (I know the later showings probably had more people, but we’re talking five people versus zero here).
3 viewers per screening!? I think that defines a movie black hole. Actually I know it does, because I just made up that term a few paragraphs up.
So I guess the point I’m trying to get at is that I’m looking for exactly 2.667 people to go see the movie with this weekend. Who’s in?