Joe Gorga and Melissa Gorga started off the current season of The Real Housewives of New Jersey with a bang (pun grudgingly intended), when they managed to pack a mind boggling amount of sexual innuendo into the first episode. And the overshares didn’t stop there. In the second episode last weekend, the Gorgas continued their streak (sorry, that one was unintended) with even more hints about their very active sex life. We even saw Joe carry Melissa off to the bedroom at the end of the episode. It ruined kind of a great moment, really. There was almost some real romance there, until Joe gave the a big, giddy grin that accompanies all of his TMI moments, and told us how turned on he was. Over. Share.
The hashtag #gorgasms is a thing now. Great.
I’ve never been ashamed of my reality TV viewing habits. Call it trashy, I don’t care. I own it. But this… I feel shame. I am so appalled by the sliminess of the Gorgas’ constant sex talk that I want to hate them. But something about them fascinates me. I just can’t look away. Is this what it feels like to have – gasp – a guilty pleasure?!
We can no longer ignore Joe Gorga’s intense desire to make sure the entire world knows everything about his sex life. His overshares are so dramatic, we can’t help but wonder if he’s trying to cover something up. But we’ll let you be the judge. For your viewing (dis)pleasure: Joe Gorga’s grossest sex quotes accompanied by pictures, because we can.