Update: To all the commenters, here on Crushable and on Twitter who have reached out in defense of Britney—I don’t hate Britney. All I was trying to communicate is that I miss her old career.
Update #2: In case you didn’t want to wade through the 75 comments this post amassed, I’ve put together the most creative death threats I received since yesterday.
Britney Spears is trying to feed us a load of bullshit about how the Twister Dance is “an evolution for kids” that “brings their techniques to the next level,” but we know what this really is: Two has-beens collaborating to stay relevant.
Twister is one of those classic games that never gets old even and whose components don’t need updates. (Like the game of Tetris I play on my morning commute on my 1998 GameBoy Color. What point is there to getting a Nintendo DS when all that works fine?) You spin the wheel, you put your hands and feet on the corresponding colors, you get awkwardly tied up with your friends/coworkers/crushes/exes or whomever you’ve roped into this game. Simple as that.
But not in Britney’s world. With Twister Dance, you follow steps on a DVD and try to copy them on the mat. Which sounds like Just Dance or one of those follow-the-leader dance games, only half as fun.
There was no need for Hasbro to update Twister; instead, it comes across like they’re just trying to copy what’s hot out there. And honestly, the last few years haven’t done much to convince me that we need more Britney music… and I’m a diehard pop fan! This all just seems unnecessary.
You know what’s the most interesting part of this story? That Britney wore a $20,000 sports bra to the shoot. Sigh.