A Guy Says: The Hunger Games Is Just Another Misleading Chick Flick

The Hunger Games is out.  I’ll wait for you to stop screaming with excitement.  Ready?  Oh, I think that girl over there just fainted.  Someone get her water.  You okay?  Good.  I’ll say it again.  The Hunger Games is out in theaters!  The anticipation is over!  And I am reminded, once again, that I am very much not a teenage girl.  Of course, I am reminded of this daily, like when I don’t wish Justin Bieber would magically ask me to prom or when I don’t have to buy my first bra.

In recent years though, pop culture, and specifically film, has been reminding me of this fact more often.  It all started with Twilight, which created a new kind of chick-flick.  Chick-flicks have been entertaining women and annoying men for centuries.  I believe it was Shakespeare who once wrote, “My mind a haze, I think my thoughts a mess/ I hate the film I saw, the twenty-seventh dress.”  I think that’s from Hamlet.

But, movies like Twilight and The Hunger Games are a different breed.  At first glance, they seem kind of awesome.  Vampires, werewolves, death, hunger, games?  Guys love all those things.  So, when we’re asked by a lady friend, “Will you see this movie with me?  Please?  It would mean so much to me,” we say, “Of course,” in a heartbeat.  Then, we see the movie and it turns out, it’s a chick-flick in disguise.  A lady-movie in a mask.  We’ve been tricked, and we feel stupid.

To make it worse, we have no way of gaining retribution through the power of cinema.  There are no guy movies in disguise.  I’ve never gone to a movie that I thought was going to be the tale of two star-crossed lovers and seen everybody blown to smithereens.  But I’d love to.  It would be a great way to get back at movies that I think are going to be great, but instead make me listen to Robert Pattinson for two hours.

That’s why I propose this: men should boycott The Hunger Games until Hollywood produces a trilogy of action movies disguised as mushy love stories.  We should ignore the cat calls of adolescent girls and the invitations of our slightly older girlfriends until this happens.

I can imagine the trailer now.  A beautiful man holds hands with an even more beautiful woman while walking on a gorgeous beach under the auburn hue of sunset.  They kiss and then hold each other as a wave breaks upon the beach.  But then, when you go to see the movie it turns out to be nothing but two hours of grotesque violence.  Limbs being blown from torsos.  Eyeballs popping out like kernels in a popcorn machine.  You know, guy stuff.  Think The Notebook for the trailer and Saw for the movie.

The Hunger Games is just another example of girls making guys see movies they don’t want to see, and that is wrong.  After all, guys never make girls sit through movies they could never possibly like.  It never happens.  So, I’ll wait for the Hollywood to respond to my request for a movie with violence dressed up as a love story.  It could take a while.  They haven’t made anything like that in, I don’t know, something like a week.

You can reach this post's author, Harry Barron, on twitter.
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    • T-Lex

      I really at to say it because this post is not as bad but this reeks a little of “why is there no white history month?”. To your second idea how about Braveheart or any war movie ever made?

      • sam

        This is sarcasm, right? “After all, guys never make girls sit through movies they could never possibly like. It never happens.” That HAS to be sarcasm…right?

    • Chad

      Have you actually seen the movie yet? I’d like to know opinions from guys that have actually seen it if they think it’s a chick flick.

    • blah

      I am a guy, and I was deceived into seeing this movie. The writer of this article is absolutely right. The movie has a great premise, wonderful ideas, etc., but then they shove a terrible love story right in your face. And for all the women complaining that they have to see action movies, don’t go. We don’t care if you don’t go. We would rather see them with our bros than listen to you complain after. Ironically, women seem to care a lot if we don’t go to your crappy love stories with you. k bro?

      • KrispyShell

        i respect your comment man. i mean Hollywood does use romance to suck women into watching their stuff, and a woman myself i’m not all that offended by this article.

        i won’t deny that i was looking forward to how they pulled off the cave scene in the movie (never said i wasn’t a romantic), but they made less romantic than what was written in the book and i actaully like how it was pulled off. and personally i would have loved to see them get a little more graphic with those killings scenes of the other tributes. all and all, preach man, preach

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    • gnatcar

      So if a movie has ANY romance in it…even if it is also a bit too violent for most girl’s liking, it is a chick flick?

      I don’t think so.

      But, if that is YOUR definition of a chick flick…you must have some seriously narrow movie tastes.

    • D

      Wow wow wow! This is the most narrow minded and pathetic article I have ever read in my life. The romance is literally to a minimum and not at all shoved in anyones face. Its ridiculous if you think this is by any means a story for girls..for one i was shown the series by a middle aged married man. If you saw the film you obviously didnt learn shit. True example of a capitol citizen. And for the record, saw it with a huge group of guys who actually have the intellectual capabilities to actually for 1 read the book, and the realize the important political back drops as well as love the movie, and they are “manly” men.

    • maria

      To all you guys who only like action movies and chick flick loving girls, WHY DO YOU DATE IF YOU HAVE NOTHING IN COMMON??

    • Kim

      There are about 24 contestants and of those 24 we see about five deaths on screen and this includes those viewed through terrible, amateur shaky cam. (I have no time to add up how many people we saw die, this is a guess.) So to disappointed boys out there, you aren’t alone some girls feel the same way too. I had hoped that the film might be better that the book which is much of the same. 200 pages of a build up to this brutal, violent hunger games and all we get is Katniss darting around the outskirts of the arena. I find it hard to believe in the dystopian world that was built up that Katniss would have any emotion for anyone else, let alone Prim.

      Here is a suggestion. Pick up a copy of the manga (it was also a novel) Battle Royale. If you don’t like reading, there is a film. You say Katniss Everdeen, I say Mitsuko Souma. I am going to put that film on now and put this whole ugly business behind me!

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    • Mr F

      I was interested in The Hunger Games when I first heard about it. A Dystopian Future involving a “game” forcing contestants to kill each other. Almost sounded like a new iteration of The Running Man.
      Until I found out there was a female lead and a love triangle. Now the only reason I am going to see this at all is because I made a deal. I would see this movie is she sees Prometheus.
      Don’t get me wrong I don’t entirely hate female protagonists. Ellen Ripley (Aliens) and Sarah Connor (T2 not T1) were some of the most bad-ass characters to ever grace cinema. And neither of them needed a romantic interest.

      • Guy Fawkes

        This movie has a powerful meaning behind it like the Matrix and V for Vendetta.
        I’d suggest you wake up to that.
        Is there a love triangle? Yeah kinda.
        Is it ridiculous and just plain creepy like in twilight? No.
        This is not an “action” movie by any means nor a chick flick.
        There is action, romance, and a political (complete ant-government aka anarchist) agenda with A+ acting. What more could you want?

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