6 Philosophical Questions I Have After Watching Real Housewives of Orange County

3. Is Slade the most hated housewife in Bravo history?

I have never been a huge fan of Slade Smiley. I’ve thought he was kind of a d-bag ever since he was engaged to Jo. And since he keeps popping up season to season, some fans have deemed him an “honorary housewife.” This episode, he tried his hand at stand-up comedy and failed miserably. I tried to follow his whole skit about being a “housewife hunter” and the Powerpoint presentation and the penis jokes, but like Alexis said, “I don’t get half of these jokes.” He then decided to take aim at Vicki and Tamra (and Lynn! Um, leave her out of this, she’s hasn’t been on the show for like a year.) and show unflattering photos of them and called them “nasty little f–ks”. He also compared Vicki to Ms. Piggy which I thought was kind of uncalled for. Slade is not fairing well this season so far. More like Slade Frowny! Get it? Frown instead of smile? Maybe I should try my hand at stand-up!

4. What does Tamra want to do for herself?

Tamra and her Latin lover Eddie had some serious discussions during this episode about taking the next step in their relationship. Eddie suggested that Tamra move in with her, but she was pretty hesitant. She said that there are a lot of things to consider (though she does not mention her kids in their first conversation) before they make a huge move like living together. She then broke down at dinner and said that there is so much she wants to do for herself. Eddie asked her multiple times what exactly that means, and Tamra doesn’t know. I get the feeling that we’ll see a liquor line, makeup line, handbag line, or clothing line courtesy of Tamra Barney in the near future, guys. It’s the housewife way.

5. Should Vicki be dating so soon?

Vicki revealed in the first episode of the new season that her and Don were on their way to divorce, and she was already dating another guy named Brooks. To add onto that, Vicki mentioned that they were “getting serious.” When she is out to dinner with her level-headed daughter Brianna, she kept her lips sealed about her new boyfriend. Her daughter expressed concern that Vicki will just jump into another relationship because she is scared of being alone. Ding! Ding! Ding! I want Brianna to be my friend. She is the smartest person on this show.

6. Where the hell is Peggy?

Did I miss the memo of Peggy not being a part of this season? She was in the first couple of episodes fighting with Alexis about her husband and their torrid love affairs and then poof! She was gone! If she is gone for good, I am going to miss her and her ginormous breasts. Thanks for the mammaries, Pegs! Get it? Mammary, like, memory? Like, boobs? I’m really considering taking this comedy thing on the road, you guys.

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    • Hannah Rose

      What struck me about this episode were all the AWKWARD moments! Of course, it obviously made for great TV! I discuss that further here: http://confabulate.com/real-housewives-of-orange-county-season-7-episode-4-recap/

    • Rose

      I don’t care for Heather either. You described her perfectly. Condescending, nothing is ever good enough for her, etc. I think she’s more jealous of Alexis, because Alexis is so pretty, more than the other way around. So what if Alexis said she was a “news anchor” rather than just a reporter? I’ve watched her on Fox5 News quite a few times and she does quite well, most of the real anchors just sit there and read off of a teleprompter anyway. She actually gets involved with the subject matter, interviews people and is very pleasant to watch.

    • Hummm

      I should have written this a week ago…my comment is about OLD FART VICKY…I have never seen someone so looney as she is. She thinks the world revolves around her OLD behind..she really needs to get off the show because she does not fit in with the other ladies. How in the world is she going to be MAD about what Slade said about her looking like MS PIGGY and she know she really does. She can hurt other peoples feelings but when someone fires back at her then she wants everyone to feel sorry for her..and now that Gretchen and Tamara are friends she can’t stand it. If I were Gretchen I would have slapped the mess out of her talking about my man. Then what does she do ..go out and attract the same type guy she said Slade was…A NO GOOD DAD!!! KARMA IS A BITCH VICKY …watch what you do and say to people..you will get everything you do to people right back on you or your kids/family…You are a miserable person…you treated Don like Sh*t, you stayed in everyone business spreading roamers that you really didn’t have proof of and now nobody likes you and you want to cry…Go find your self…I couldn’t live, work or have you as a parent…you are a controling old goat…and just notice NOBODY like being with you for a long period of time.