Jersey Shore Field Notes 5.6: The Art Of War (And Partying)

27:13: Pauly’s stalker finally approaches and reveals her identity as Vanessa.

27:53: Pauly has no interest in delving into his stalker’s motivations; he considers her a “grenade” that Vinny has thrown on him in their homosocial war. He excuses himself to go to the bathroom, further embarrassing Vanessa.

28:31: Deena muses over the strange twist of fate that makes her, Snooki, and The Situation a compatible partying team. “We hate each other, we love each other,” she laughs in the cab.

28:35: The Situation quotes what he probably thinks is The Art of War: ”I’m keeping my friends close and my enemies closer.”

29:15: Snooki dubs their triad “Team Crazypants.”

29:45: Snooki experiments with her furry persona “Lola,” as signified by a giant rabbit head she wears on roller coasters and to parties. In order to cement the bond with her fursona, she applies makeup to the head and offers advice should Lola ever contract a UTI.

30:27: Pauly communicates Danny’s anger with Deena and Snooki. Deena demonstrates no understanding of the consequences of her actions; her sole focus is on the fact that if she loses her job, she would have to move out. The potential loss of status compels her to call Danny.

31:20: Deena employs a regressive technique to sound like a whining child asking, “Are you gonna [punish] me?” in order to disempower Danny.

32:05: Snooki demonstrates a child’s tendency to be more fascinated by the container that a new toy comes in than the toy itself, climbing into a box while Vinny plays a hackeysack game.

Jenni on Jersey Shore 5x06

32:51: The Situation is already projecting out to the potential wedding of Deena’s sister and his brother, fretting that he and Deena will have the obligatory familial tie of in-laws.

33:17: Deena objects to the males discussing her sister as a sexual object.

34:10: The Situation consults with The Unit about this taboo relationship and posits the theory that his brother is trying to “smash and dash”—a potentially more troublesome development, as it will breed resentment on both sides.

35:11: Deena references three different animals’ skins in one phrase: “A leopard never sheds its stripes.”

35:45: The Situation is unwittingly put in a difficult position when Deena’s sister communicates with him via the duck phone. He dissembles, hinting that his brother might have feelings for Deena’s sister instead of revealing the truth as a sympathetic creature might.

37:10: Deena clarifies the difference between thinking The Situation is a devil and thinking he’s devilish. She is not willing to commit to a full condemnation of his character, settling for criticizing his actions.

37:40: Pauly and Vinny allow Roger to vent about his problems with his mate JWoww and their lack of communication over the phone. Roger is the first to reference their meta lives in this episode, saying that if JWoww has a problem with him, “Sell that story to someone else, you know?”

38:25: Vinny and Pauly approve of Roger’s M.O. when it comes to courtship.

38:42: Vinny acts as the liaison between JWoww and Roger, relaying Roger’s message about how they should both be more mature. He and Deena urge JWoww to take the blame on herself and apologize.

39:32: Roger scolds JWoww, and won’t listen to her apology in favor of him telling her everything that Vinny already told her. He is insulted by her lack of trust and calls her a hypocrite. He threatens that if she is less insecure, “we are going to be damned. We’re going to be done. We’re going to be ruined.”

40:38: JWoww doesn’t react well to ultimatums.

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