Bet you never thought you’d hear the phrase “Lord VoldemortÂ reads Harry PotterÂ erotica in his pajamas,” right? But that’s the beauty of Andy Cohen‘s Sunday night show Watch What Happens Liveâ€”he wrangles the most random guests and puts them in uncomfortable situations for our enjoyment. Last night, he and Ralph FiennesÂ – who played Voldemort throughout the PotterÂ films — both donned striped jammies and slippers before Andy made his move.
Holly HunterÂ was there too, but this story is about Harry PotterÂ and not Thirteen.
Poor Ralph (which is actually pronounced like “Rafe”) looked like he was trying to curl into a little ball of embarrassment when Andy started in on PotterÂ erotica. (Which, to be fair, is so 2001.) He definitely didn’t seem to be having as much fun as Michael SheenÂ did reading TwilightÂ fanfic, but that’s probably because here poor Ralph had to face the knowledge that thousands of fans had imagined him having sex with a thirteen-year-old boy. So overall, Andy’s joke was about half as effective as he must have intended: He got Ralph to read a few lines while sexy saxophone music played, but Ralph didn’t look like he actually had a lot of fun doing it.
I was going to link to the entire “Broken Innocence” fic, but wowÂ is it dirtyâ€”and not in a good way, since it involves underage Harry and rape. The Watch What HappensÂ interns who had to troll the internet for the most graphic porn fic also managed to pull out the only five clean lines for reading it on-air.