Holiday Gift Guide: 12 Bizarre ‘[Gift] Of The Month’ Clubs

I love the specificity of this one--not only is it a tie, it's a skinny tie, and not only is it a skinny tie, but it's a crocheted tie. It would take a more artsy job to actually be able to wear this to the office, but it's certainly original.

The foods in this three- and six-month membership are blacklisted because of their ability to ruin diets, food allergies, and kosher guidelines, but boy do they look good: Arkansas Peppered Bacon, Manchester Double Cream Cheese, Sea-Salt-Topped Pecan Blondie, Ginger Jump-Up Molasses Cookie.

I dunno, I just find something creepy about having lobster tails shipped to you and expecting them to still be fresh. And how come "you won't find them in stores"? It sounds like some secret mob deal.

As tacky/shady as it sounds, the panty of the month club features brands like Cosabella and Hanky Panky; you choose the style and size each month, and the rest is taken care of for you. You also get a "special surprise" (gulp) and a $10 gift card; this might be the most economical of the bunch. Unfortunately, it won't automatically make you look like these Victoria's Secret ladies.

This is for a very specific person, the kind who's fascinated by nature and would be excited to receive a new sandwich bag of lichen each month, even in the winter (which is apparently a big selling point). There are worse ways to spend $80, but there are also better ones for us.

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The best "gift of the month" clubs seem to be the ones with perishable items--something that you are sure to use before the next month's item comes in. What, then, are you supposed to do with each of these slightly creepy teddy bears? Thankfully it's only a six-month deal, but no one knows enough children to fob these off on.

Mini pies! In jam jars! Flaky, gooey goodness in a reusable mason jar. I never knew until now that this is what I've wanted.

Who needs four different badge reels for their office IDs? Someone who treats them the way you would hats or scarves, apparently--a new one depending on the weather or your mood that day.

I didn't even know this was a thing, but it's a cool idea: Sparkling rings made up of the stuff you'd put on your nails. For someone considering bright orange nails but not willing to invest the time and money into a manicure.

Yes, there at least six varieties of pickle; this half-year membership gives you pickled red peppers, leeks, and fennel. I didn't realize you could pickle cauliflower, but it sounds mouth-watering.

What a random thing to send to your friends; you might ask why you couldn't just pay for a Crayola box for less. But these crayons come in cool shapes: Dinosaurs, Easter eggs, even LEGOs!

Do we have to be dollhouse enthusiasts to receive these? Because these are so adorable. We don't know what we'd do with them except just set them up on our desks in little tableus and squeal over them all day. That's what the Christmas spirit is about, right?