First off, it’s way too early to be releasing a Christmas remix—Halloween hasn’t even happened yet! And even then, the only socially acceptable time is the day after Thanksgiving. But Justin Bieber decided to get into the holiday spirit way early, by teaming up with Mariah Carey to record a new version of “All I Want For Christmas Is You.”
This song is one of the few modern tunes that’s been almost universally accepted into the traditional Christmas song canon. (That’s right: Mariah wrote it way back when.) And then Bieber comes along and reminds us why most singers’ covers get one listen before they’re permanently deleted off our iTunes.
It doesn’t help that this is my favorite Christmas song. But I can tell you that objectively this is just bad. For one, it’s incredibly overproduced. Part of what makes the original so fun is that it’s relatively simple; sure, there’s a healthy smattering of synthesizers, but Mariah’s voice still stands out. With this one, I kept feeling like I was getting weird interference in the background.
Justin’s voice sounds weirdly low and deep here. You would think that if he were trying to bring this poor song into his brand, he would at least make it sound like his usual stuff. And it’s not as if there are a shortage of high notes in the song!
Also: Mariah’s original version was recorded in 1993, the year before Justin was even born. What the hell, man.