As you may know by now, Lady Gaga‘s music video for the unnecessarily umlautted “Yoü And I” has arrived, and it supports my theory that the blander and more generic her music gets, the weirder she is obligated to look. Did an evil witch cast a spell on her dooming her to these two diverging narratives? Anyway, “You And I” (I just decided I’m protesting the umlaut) sounds just like that Shania Twain song all the 11-year-olds wouldn’t stop singing when I was at Jew camp in 1999, so the imagery is correspondingly wackypants. But perhaps there’s more to it than meets the eye? Come along with me and I will decipher what it means.