Creepy Things That Seem Real But Aren’t is a new series that explores modern urban legends, bringing you a new tale each week.
There’s an amateur fitness series on YouTube called EVERYMANHYBRID that isn’t really much of a fitness series. Created by the titular “EverymanHYBRID” (whatever that means) Vincent, “Nutritional Correspondent” Evan, and cameraman Jeff, it likes to call itself “your go-to guide for health on a budget.” But there’s something hiding behind this series– and you may not like what you find.
When I say that it isn’t really much of a fitness series, I do mean that– mostly, it’s just a bunch of goofy videos of Vincent and Evan sitting around and shooting the shat about such no-duh fitness advice as making sure you stretch before and after working out and utilizing a long, hot soak in a tub for sore muscles. Ground-breaking stuff!… Or not. Vincent himself doesn’t really seem to be much of a health nut. The series’ first real video, geared towards the art of nighttime jogging, features a clip of him jogging around the one-minute mark; and you know, I’m not usually one to make fun of people who work out, given that I’m so bad about actually doing it myself– but I have friends who are pretty hardcore runners, and they definitely don’t look like this when they run:
Note the lack of appropriate running gear, as well as the fact that he appears to have only run as far as it took to get this shot– no more, no less.
Evan’s “nutritional advice” isn’t much better. It’s all pretty standard “don’t eat junk food” stuff, although he doesn’t really seem to know what he’s talking about:
Don’t eat cookies all the time? Well, duh. Trail mix is a healthy snack? Well, it’s got more nutritional value than some of the alternatives, but you could be reaching for something better. Reach for the aforementioned trail mix instead of for chips when you’re sitting in front of the TV and hit by an attack of the munchies? I’m not sure which is worse: Feeding the munchies, consuming copious amounts of trail mix, or parking in front of the telly for hours at a time. I suspect our friends over at Blisstree might have a little something to say about that.
Anyway, the whole series is laughably bad, though not particularly scary (unless you happen to be an actual fitness or nutrition expert). But if you’ve been looking closely, you may have noticed a few odd occurrences: Some audio distortion here and there; a elongated shape or something hanging out in the corner of the shot. We’ve seen things sort of like this before, so they probably didn’t phase you that much.
You may also have noticed that those occurrences look sort of fake.
And you would be absolutely correct, because hey, guess what? That’s our buddy Slender Man hanging out in the background! What these three guys did was enlist a fourth friend to pose as a fake Slender Man in an attempt to ride the Slendy gravy train as far as it would take them. The whole “fitness series” thing was just a premise, a template into which Vincent, Evan, and Jeff could insert their friend Daniel dressed up in a black suit, skinny tie, and face-obscuring mask. What can I say. College guys are willing to do weird things for a laugh.
But then this happened: