Neither Nick Lachey nor Vanessa Minnillo has a job right now, but that hasn’t stopped them from using their upcoming wedding to try and seem relevant. In the past few weeks, I’ve seen photos from their his-and-hers bridal shower and engagement party. Now, TLC has announced that they’re going to air the couple’s wedding in a one-off special tentatively titled Nick & Vanessa’s Dream Wedding.
Nick and Vanessa, do you think you’re Prince William and Kate Middleton? I seriously doubt that Nick will ever be the leader of a country, and I also seriously doubt that Vanessa could look gorgeous and classy in a modest long-sleeved gown. Also, it is unlikely that anyone attending the wedding will be wearing insane hats and fascinators that look somewhat like the flying spaghetti monster. In other words, there is no fucking reason to televise your wedding. Do you have a huge army of fans that I don’t know about who are clamoring to see more details from your already overexposed personal life? Like, do you think you’re Brangelina? Because you’re not.
Sorry! This poll is now closed.