I used to date Bill Hader. He’s hilarious and everything, but ultimately we broke up because he realized that I was actually in love with his Saturday Night Live character, Stefon, and not with him. Though my relationship with Billfon only lasted a few minutes, those were a great couple of minutes. But I woke up to find that Billfon was gone and my actual boyfriend, who would be upset if I left him for Bill Hader but would probably want to come along if I left him for Stefon, was there.
It’s normal to dream about celebrities – in fact, famous people often represent real people in your life in dreamland. And if you spend a lot of time reading celebrity gossip sites or reading about famous people in magazines, it’s logical for stuff you’ve learned that day to bleed into your subconscious. To make sure I wasn’t alone in my neurosis, I polled other members of Team Crushable.