Man, how disappointing was Mean Girls 2: Meet The Plastics? Maybe we were aiming our hopes a little too high that an ABC Family sequel would be anywhere near as good as something adapted by Tina Fey and starring a pre-wrecked Lindsay Lohan, but last night’s premiere was devastating. And not just because it was a watered-down, unfunny version of Mean Girls, either! In fact, that would have been a blessing.
The plot of Mean Girls 2follows a similar format as the original: the new girl at school Jo (a Lohan stand-in) befriends the big artist/outcast Abby and together they plot takes down the school’s popular girls, known as the “Plastics.” Except in this one, Abby isn’t a viciously sarcastic goth (like Lizzy Caplan‘s Janis Ian in the original) who doesn’t give a shit what the Regina Georges of the world think of her. In fact, Abby would make Janis Ian sick: she’s a meek pushover who bows down to those very same girls that she claims to despise.
Oh, and Jo doesn’t befriend her based on any similar likes or interests, she does it because Abby’s dad promises to get Jo into a good college and basically pay for the rest of her life if she takes care of his daughter. What?