Why Chloe Sevigny and Pauly D. Would Make The Best Couple Ever

By now, you may have heard the rumors that indie darling Chloe Sevigny may be dating Jersey Shore cast member Pauly D. (DelVecchio). The couple sat next to each other at a Knicks game last week, and it is common knowledge in America that you must have sex with whoever is sitting closest to you at a sporting event. It’s the law!

As quickly as this gossip fire spread, Chloe’s PR people put it out with a big watering hose of no-fun, saying “it’s not true” that the twosome were dating, and they had actually just met for the first time at the game. And while this does put a damper on the Photoshop I was making of their future babies (hint: It’s like Casper with Cowboy Bebop hair!), I’m still convinced that the Brown Bunny star has a future with the DJ from Providence. Here’s why.

Pauly D. is the best member of Jersey Shore, hands down. He’s sweet, goofy, and may actually have some talent (he was nominated as one of America’s best DJs this year, no joke!). But he’s still a “celebrity” of the lowest caliber: a reality show star on a show about ridiculous clown stereotypes incarnate.

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