The Official Frat Party Survival Guide: 6 Things You Need To Know Before Rush Week Ends

You’re moved in to a dorm, you’ve made some friends, you’re sick from dining hall food. College is fun, now isn’t it! If you enjoy free alcoholic beverages, rowdy people, sweating and crowded spaces — it’s probably time to head to a frat party. If fraternities do not abound, the rules should apply to any rowdy gathering involving boisterous young men. And even if you’re past the freshman year prime, the following guidance should serve as a good refresher course.

Be fashionably late by at least 30 minutes: Most parties are scheduled with the assumption that people will be running late. Showing up early will make you seem out of the loop. During freshman year orientation, my friends and I met a sophomore guy who invited us to a party at his frat. He told us to come by around 10, so, wanting to seem polite, we rang the doorbell just after 10. It seemed quiet, to say the least. When we asked where we could find our new friend, we were directed upstairs, only to find him walking out of the shower, wearing only a towel. We took the cue to head back later. Much, much later.

Always pregame the pregame: Don’t expect top shelf liquor at any large gathering. In all likelihood, you’ll be drinking something from a plastic bottle that’s labeled as vodka but tastes more like rubbing alcohol. Even if you can stomach the taste, the hangover will likely leave you incapacitated through the next afternoon. Not to mention, you’ll have a tough time finding anything to mix the liquor with once you’re at the party. If you can get your hands on something better before you head over to rage, definitely do so.

Be wary of Jungle Juice, or any alcoholic punch that lives in a bucket: Aside from the dirtiness factor, jungle juice (or whatever the local punch of choice may be) is pretty much the collegiate version of mystery meat.

Be careful walking down stairs: There is a big, big chance you will get pushed, or spilled on, or slip while walking down those rickety basement stairs so common at these gatherings. Be particularly mindful when it rains. After some inclement weather last year, I went with friends to a big party where the floors were slick. A friend of mine lingered too long on the stairway, and managed to fall down a story of steps. It was a classic scene from a teen movie moment.

Do not wear high heels: If you wear your Sunday Best to a frat party, you’re doing the opposite of playing it cool. You’ll look inexperienced and it will seem like you’re trying too hard. Also, see above: story of friend who fell down stairs.

Don’t bring a coat unless it’s a blizzard: Do you want to leave your coat behind a chair, where it will probably be ruined? Didn’t think so! Let’s also not forget the theft factor. A friend of mine thought she “lost” her coat, until she spotted another girl wearing it on the way to class.

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    • gearkat

      One of the most hilarious college sights are the sorority girls running to the bar/party without a coat when the temperature is around 0 F. Can you say ‘headlights’!! I knew you could!!

    • Chuck

      Alcohol is not allowed at any of the sorority events and coming in pre-gamed can get you not offerred a bid. Most sorority and colleges have a pretty strict rush policy.

    • Ashley

      Yeah, “not allowed”. I was in a sorority for four years, as long as you’re not passing out in a pool of your own puke or not able to function, if a sorority wants you a sister will tell you to “not let it happen again” and the incident will be forgotten. As for the heels comment, I always wore heels if it was rush, we were expected to the only time we weren’t expected to wear “pin attire” was at unofficial parties. Bad shoes got many a girl cut from my sorority sad but true.

      • Laila

        Are you in any form a Delta?

    • Mike

      Your rush guide is ridiculous and insane. It should offend any current member of greek system and an alumni. It’s apparent the writer of this story was not a member of the greek system, you cast all greeks in a dark light. Why is it nothing is ever written about all the positive things the greeks do for the community, it’s so confusing. You constantly mention parties in your article.
      Granted there are parties and when greeks throw a party their the best on campus! So, before you slam the greeks “Hillary Riensberg” remember you were in the library on Friday nights while the rest of us were having a blast at our parties. Hope you had as much fun there as I did at my fraternity. I’ll cherish my memories the rest of my life, can you say the same? I am a “50″ year old alumni and look forward to my kids joining my fraternity. I can hardly wait to write my first check for their monthly dues, money well spent!

      • Gaby

        haha if only you knew

      • J

        I sincerely hope your kids enjoy the friends that you’re buying them.

    • Blutarsky

      Most underrated line in Animal House is “We need the Dues” when Flounder’s photo is shown on the screen. That entire scene was very realistic.

    • Ashley

      I’m in a sorority too, but look at the title people…FRAT Party Survival Guide. All of these things can be applied to both rush (for frats) and any other parties throughout the year.