• Wed, Sep 8 2010

Off The Market: Kymera Magic Wand, A Button-Less Remote For Muggles

Finally…a magic wand for adults! That’s what she said. Ha. But seriously, the Kymera Magic Wand is a must-have for all magic loving muggles, especially ones who hate using their remote control and want to look super cool in front of their friends/coworkers/book club/kids/nieces/nephews/neighbors/mailmen — well, just about everyone.

I am not just ranting and raving about this wand because I eat, sleep and breathe Harry Potter. It’s so much more than that. Remotes are so 2000’s. Don’t you get sick and tired of pressing buttons on a stupid remote? Me too. I’m so thankful that there’s something we can finally do about it. With the Kymera Magic Wand, everything is so easy and button-free! A simple swish-and-flick and you’re at the guide screen.

When I first brought home the wand, I was very confused as to how it would know just what I wanted to do. And because of how truly fantastical the idea of using a wand instead of remote control is, I assumed that it would be too hard for me to figure out. However, upon carefully reading the instructions, I quickly understood how to use it. And, I became a fourth year wizard in about an hour. Some may consider that time consuming, but it’s a magic wand that works as a remote for your television — if you expected it to be much easier then you don’t really deserve to be a wizard at all.

Since I’ve been through this once already, I have some advice on how to best approach setting up the Kymera Magic Wand. When you begin reading the instructions, take it slow. Make sure you understand what each paragraph is trying to tell you. To minimize stress levels, use the buddy system. Have a friend nearby to help you understand how to program the wand. I would recommend reading the instructions several times before first attempting to program it. Yo’llu get to choose which motion will control each function on the television, so act out the motions with your buddy to make sure you’ve got it down before committing to each one. I won’t spoil the excitement by telling you exactly how it works, but I can assure you that the instructions are straightforward and the result is so worth your time.

Beyond it’s entertainment value, the wand can be beneficial to you, and it’s also great for non-believers. When you tell your friends that you control your television with a magic wand, it will sound like you’re making a childish joke. But you’ll have the last laugh when your dubious friends come over to watch the game and, with a quick flick of the wrist, your television has not only been turned on, but you’ve found the HD channel and set it to the volume of your choice — with a magic wand.

As for storage, it comes equipped with an elegant black box with red velvet interior so that you’ll never have to dive into the depths of your couch for your remote again. Harry Potter taught us that the wizard doesn’t choose the wand, but the wand chooses the wizard. Your Kymera Magic Wand is waiting for you.

Share This Post:
  • D.J. Pitts

    I know someone who owns one of these. Long story short, he’s my half-brother and he hasn’t left the house in a little more than 7 years, apart from the opening of these Damned movies. You can imagine the social life he leads as well as the opportunity for upward mobility in his position as an at home telemarketer.