Crushable Asks: Would You Hold A Joint Bachelor/Bachelorette Party?

Next month, one of my oldest friends from elementary school is getting married, and today I got an email inviting me to a sort of anti-bachelor/bachelorette party for the couple. Basically, instead of spending one of their last nights of singledom out partying it up with strippers or phallic-candy and pink shots (respectively), the duo is spending their time together. What sort of sense does that make?

Apparently, “Jack and Jill Showers” have worked their way into the mainstream, where both the future bride and groom get their friends together while they receive tons of presents. Which I get: If a guy wants to have as big of a fuss made over him as his wife to be, then by all means, have yourself a Bridal and Groomal Shower.

But taking the raunchy sanctity of a bachelor party and turning it into a couple’s night seems completely incongruous to the ritual of pre-wedding jitters. I asked my friend what prompted her and her fiance to decide on a party with all their friends (isn’t that just called ‘the wedding?’), as opposed to the traditional girls and boys night out. She responded:

I think if (my fiance) and his pals were a different breed of dude they might have more of an interest in going the traditional bachelor party route, but i think the idea of being anywhere near a stripper is confusing for most of them. He has also said that the main people he would invite to a bachelor party are his band mates, and he hangs out with them all the time at danky bars anyway. as for a bachelorette party, there’s a plan to do a pre-wedding massage/nails type of thing a day or two before the wedding with bridesmaids and moms.

Obviously Marielle’s fiance is a pretty enlightened dude to see that going out and drinking with your bros isn’t something that happens only a few days before the wedding. And while I’ll be sad not to purchase a novelty penis-shaped box of chocolate for my friend, I respect her decision to have a low-key, less stressful event as well.

But we want to hear from you guys: Would you consider forgoing a bachelorette party, or ask your boyfriend not to have one in exchange for a ‘Jack and Jill’ event? Let us know!

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    • Mo’nique 2

      Any guy should cut bait on marrying a girl who wants a party called Jack and Jill anyhthing

    • sweetz

      My roommate just got invited to one of these, and we were just talking about it-I think it’s a little goofy. I understand wanting to stay away from the traditional scene of skeezy strippers, but who said a bachelor party had to involve strippers? And why does a bachelorette party have to involve tacky dick-shaped everything? They don’t have to involve these things! They just have to involve having some time with your friends and away from your partner. Nothing wrong with that. Personally, I just feel like a bachelorette party would be a good opportunity for me to spend some needed QT with my girlfriends before such a big, life-changing event.

    • Kate

      I think it’s a great idea! Not every man is a disguesting hornball who needs to go see a stripper a week or two before their wedding. We’re doing it and it’s going to be epic! Plus, cut bait? Whatev

    • john

      The couple wants to go to vegas together with 12 people.
      Personally I don’t want to spend 1500 bucks on a trip to have a chaperone of girls who are already taken.
      What do you think?