• Fri, Jul 2 2010

‘Bethenny Getting Married?’ Doll Recap: ‘I’m A Pregnant Sequined Prostitute!!!’

Is Bethenny Getting Married? Now she is! On last night’s episode, Bethenny Frankel was shown 7 months pregnant and preparing to walk down the aisle with fiance, now-husband Jason Hoppy. Besides the fact that Jill Zarin wasn’t invited and will never be allowed to babysit her child (duh), things were happy and light and very un-Housewives as wedding bells began ringing.

But the episode was not without drama. For example:

1. Bethenny squeezed into several dresses for her baby shower but none of them fit. She fake-screamed at her bridesmaid Teri and nameless stylist before choosing a sparkly minidress, quipping, “I’m a pregnant sequined prostitute!!!!”

2. Bethenny told her Overzealous Wedding Planner, “I will rip your dick off,” if he messed up her nuptials. Then she cracked, “Namaste,” and they laughed. Dysfunctional relationship! Also, hilarious.

3. She and Jason met with their wedding officiant, and in a moving scene, Bethenny began crying after the officiant asked whether she’d have any family members attending. (As Housewives‘ viewers will recall, her father died last season and she is estranged from her “crazypants” mother). It was especially touching when Jason, a calming force in her hectic life, soothed her with the highest compliment, “You’re gonna be the best mother ever.”

4. Bethenny’s dog Cookie is not a fan of Overzealous Wedding Planner, who refers to her as “Cujo.” As it happened, she bit him on the leg at her master’s Tribeca condo! Cookie is well trained.

5. Bethenny threw a pre-wedding “rehearsal luncheon” for friends and family, where she presented Jason with a painting of a runaway bride (winking at her noncommittal past). Jason love d it. Then his dad called Bethenny “beautiful, awesome and pregnant.” Then Bethenny’s assistant said she and Jason make “each other better.” We don’t cry a lot, but there were a few tears on our end. Ack. We’re drinking the Kool-Aid!

Anyhoo, Bethenny Barbie breaks down the episode in slideshow form. Check it.

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  • Tralece Williams

    All I know is, if Bethany wants to ever move on from married life. I will gladly take that handsome, with character, and class home with me. Oh my, he is the cutest thing since Brad Pitt. And I usually don’t write stuff like this, but man, he needs a show of his own so we can just look at him and those dimples. Good God he is a hunk! Just e-mail me Bethany, and this Kentucky girl will be right over prompltly. No, congrats on your life, enjoy!! Really, with all honesty. He’s hot girlfriend…