• Fri, Jun 25 2010

‘Bethenny Getting Married?’ Doll Recap: ‘I Have No Idea Why He Picked Me!’

Bethenny Frankel is documenting her pregnancy, engagement and hectic work-life balance on Bethenny’s Getting Married? The Housewives‘ spin-off shows that Bethenny having a life outside the crazee crew — who knew? — and on the show, we see her acerbic personality but also her humanity. It is true, Bethenny has a soul. Her bark is worse than her bite but her bite still hurts. Last night, the puffy-and-pregnant reality TV/SkinnyGirl chef snapped at her overzealous wedding planner for suffocating her by “hovering.” She felt bad though. She felt overwhelmed because her life was in disarray and her book editor needed her to complete another lifestyle manual. (Earlier in the episode: She had a signing at a Costco, and no one showed up — so she went bulk-food shopping instead.) At her breaking point, she cried, “Being able to do it all defines me — and not being able to do it all freaks me out. I don’t know who I am!” She talked to her therapist about it, and cutting to her core, he asked, “Why is it so important for you to be successful?”

Subtext: She is filling a void left by her absentee parents! Back at her Tribeca condo, Bethenny got ready for her and Jason‘s Bachelorette/Bachelor trip down to Atlantic City. She made her young assistant pack her underwear; when he grimaced (and rightly so?), she quipped, “My vagina’s not in them. They’re clean.” Then Overzealous Wedding Planner arrived with good news: He booked the Four Seasons! Bad news: They were overbudget and needed to cut costs for the Big Day. So they scratched the “little runway” off the list of wedding-related props because it cost $4,000. Also, he hates Bethenny’s adorable dog, Cookie. He sniped, “Cookie turned into Cujo. I don’t like that bitch!” That’s way harsh, Overzealous Wedding Planner.

Cut to Atlantic City. Bethenny, Jason and company stayed at the Borgata. Everyone gambled and this random lady with her face blurred out approached Bethenny and said she knew her tarot-card reader or something weird like that. Then she fell on her ass, and Bethenny said, “Cleanup on aisle 9!” and everyone laughed. At dinner, Bethenny asked her friend Teri to be her Maid Of Honor. Teri — a lightweight drinker — boozily accepted the honor! They started talking about Jason, and how sure Bethenny was that she wanted to marry him; Bethenny joked that she was “88 to 92% show” then admitted she was 100% all in. She said, “I have no idea why he picked me!” To which Teri replied, “I don’t know either! You’re really tough.” Bethenny erupted in laughter, because she likes it when people point out the obvious. She told Teri not to drink too much at the wedding.

The next morning, a totally hungover, shirtless Jason wore a glittery sash and stoned expression. “You have fur on your tongue! You look like ass,” said Bethenny. Then she kissed him, and said, “I am a million times sure I want to marry you.”

Awwwww. Remember our Bethenny doll from the Real Housewives Doll recaps? She’s back, in our gallery below:

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